happy fall

happy fall, everyone... :o)

i have been a TOTAL blog-slacker and want to apologize - work has been stressful and honestly, i'm not even getting on the computer when i get home at night... i just haven't been in the mood really (or for a lot of things lately), so i'm hoping to snap out of this funk soon... i can't really put a finger on what/why but i know it's there, looming behind the scenes, and the only thing i'm able to focus on is work - everything else has been put on the back burner... i know i'm not fully-depressed because i have no problems eating, sleeping, or bouts of crying but i know it's something... ugh!

i've lost focus in the last month or so and it's not that i feel myself slipping, i just don't feel in control anymore... putting myself and my health first was a no-brainer but lately, that hasn't been the case... compared to last year, i haven't done anything new exercise-wise - there's no pilates or kick-boxing class... i'm lucky to get to the gym 3-4 times a week right but know that will change soon once this annual report is done)... as for my diet - i'm not following any plan and yes, this is what i wanted a few months ago but now i'm not so sure... i've gained a few pounds and though i was safe for a while with my clothes - a few pieces are fitting differently and that's like a major wake-up call for me... i feel like i've been skating along, without getting caught, and now the alarms have gone off...

i know some of you will say, "i told you so" or "i'm surprised you lasted this long" and that's fine, but that's not why i'm telling you all this... regardless of what i decided in july, how much i've gained, or how a pair of pants fit snuggly - i do NOT regret what i did... if there's one thing that i've learned in my adult life - it's letting go and moving on... holding onto things and letting past mistakes run your life is not the answer - you will not get anywhere, learn anything new, or grow as a person... how does that saying go, "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself"...

SO this is where i am right now... i have no plan nor the time to focus right now (esp. this week) but know i have to DO something... and soon... i don't want to keep sliding in the wrong direction and then hate myself for not reaching out sooner...

happy tuesday...

case of the blahs

sorry i haven't posted, i've been around but way too busy to write anything... i'm back to hating my job right now - there's so much to do for this annual meeting plus my laundry list of other stuff keeps getting longer... i'm tired of everything again, perhaps i'm just in a funk - i know i was overdue for one anyway... eric caught some cold over the weekend so i'm just counting the days til i start feeling symptoms as well - lovely, right? hopefully i'll be okay esp. since we're going to pittsburgh this weekend and who wants to travel when they're not feeling well... :o(

anyway, my weekend was okay - we didn't do much since he was sick but did watch 'the aviator' on sunday before i went home... i spent the rest of the day sulking since i didn't have anything to do and was extremely bored - ever have one of those days where you just don't want to do anything? i wasn't tired either so i watched a lot of tv - including some of the race, the oscars, and dexter... OH, i did install my new software (adobe creative suite 3) so maybe i actually accomplished something afterall... ;o)

i also managed to get new sneakers, tried them out yesterday and they seemed good on the treadmill... i wasn't in the mood to workout but made myself do 3-miles anyway, not sure if it helped but at least i made an effort... should go today but again, not feeling like it - we'll see...

i'm not looking forward to weigh-in tomorrow either - haven't been horrible but haven't been accountable... i just get so off-course when the weekend gets here... i need to go to the grocery store too - had oatmeal with craisins and walnuts for lunch - time to restock... :o)

happy tuesday...